The modesty issue--leggings

UGH!  Once again the subject of modesty is getting debated.  I just read an article on leggings and if they are modest or not.  IMO if all you are wearing is a pair of leggins, you probably are immodest.  First, if you are a female, it is immodest to go topless.  Secondly, if you are male, well, it is probably immodest to wear leggings anywhere.

One comment that I enjoyed was "If all you have to do in your life is look and judge what others are wearing, then holy cow! "You must be one of the lucky few on this earth." Life is too short and there are so many more important things too worry about in life than leggings, with or without a knee length dress. Styles and trends come and go so fast as does youth. "Teach a man correct principles and let him govern himself" Joseph Smith. I also think that youth today need more adults to be advocates for them than judges of them."

I wish the people in my daughter's life were advocates of Joseph Smith's advice--to teach correct principles and let people govern themselves.  So many people here in the "bubble" (new term I learned from comments describing Utah) worry more about rules than they do about missionary work.  If you want to share the Gospel, teach the Gospel, and help a young man or lady to feel the Spirit, you focus on teaching them, rather than judging them.  If you get them to FEEL the Spirit, to have a testimony, THEN they will govern themselves and learn the principles.  BUT, if you impose rules, you will get rebellion, and the principles may never be taught, and you might lose a member.

We have a few kids in our ward who have fallen by the wayside, or chose to not attend Church in our ward or go to YM/YWs because of the rules implemented.  Twice my daughter has been told to not wear shorts or capris, and if she chose to, she was not welcome.  I can't imagine either of my missionaries telling a new convert this.  I feel as if I am in a constant spiritual struggle with some members who care more about "rules" than they do about my daughter's salvation.  Everything she learns about the Gospel has to come from home, because she has so many forces against her in the place she should feel the Spirit.

Anyway, enough of my rant and back to the leggings.  Why would leggings be immodest?  THEY COVER UP FOR HEAVEN'S SAKE!  So, a T-shirt is immodest because it sometimes is used to cover up areas another shirt does not cover???  It is all so ridiculous to me.

I like what one woman said: "If we are critical about their appearance, rather than welcoming, we might hurt their feelings and drive them away. I'm always so happy to see folks at church that I don't worry too much about what they're wearing."

Happy 4th of July

Life is funny.  Last year at this time I thought my heart would never stop hurting.  Destinee and Kade left on their missions, Tyler was getting ready to move out, and Kiana had girls camp for a week.  I remember being all  by myself for that week and thinking about what it would be like when my kids were all grown and gone.  It will be different.  A lot of my friends are now empty nesters.  They love it.  I sometimes wonder why.  I gave up everything to be a mom.  I quit school, gave up a career, and gave my life over to them.  I don't regret one single moment.  They have never disappointed me.  I am sure I have made plenty of mistakes in raising them, but they are my life.

Today I feel very thankful that I live in the place I do.  I am thankful for the freedoms I have.  I am thankful that I did have a choice of religion, and that I did end up at BYU, and did finally read the Book of Mormon.  I am thankful that I do have a testimony.  I wonder what my life would have been like if I had a testimony in high school and had taken Seminary.  I would have been so much further in my spiritual progression! And as much as I wanted to get out of Utah when I was younger, I am so thankful for my ancestors and their choices that placed me here.  I love where I live now.

Today is missionary email day, at least it will be for Destinee.  I am not sure if Kade will have P-day today, but I am guessing he will.  He does email from the Apple Store, so maybe I will hear from him too.  I love Mondays.  I love hearing form my kids and having that connection for just a tiny bit of time each week.  I love reading my facebook on Monday too and seeing all of the wonderful posts from my high school friends about their missionaries.  I also love to share a bit of "missionary spirit" on my facebook for those friends and family who are not members, or who are not active members, or even for those who have recently become active.

We are doing a new thing for the 4th today.  We are having Greek food.  With my parents and sister's family in Hawaii, we decided to do our own thing.  Tyler wanted to cook Greek food, so we are going with that.  We have decided that we are making a new tradition, Ethnic Day.  It may be on the 24th in the coming years, but will include the different dishes my kids have learned on their missions, or in language studies.  Tyler had Greek food in Germany, and I am sure next year Destinee or Kade will want to contribute something from their missions.  Destinee already has learned a few different cuisines.  It will be a good day.

Happy 4th, and HAPPY MISSIONARY MONDAY!

"it's just clothes after all!!"

"it's just clothes after all!!"  I just read this on a missionary blog about investigators who didn't make it into the Church building because of what they were wearing.  In the Gospel of JESUS CHRIST, when did what we wear keep a person from attending meetings?  When did clothing become more important than the worth of souls?

Studying Preach My Gospel

my missionary son has been studying Preach My Gospel, chapter 6, Developing Christlike Attributes.  I decided to also study it.

"Christlike attributes are gifts from God. They come as you use your agency righteously.
Ask your Heavenly Father to bless you with these attributes; you cannot develop them
without His help. With a desire to please God, recognize your weaknesses and be willing
and anxious to improve."

I love how we are told that they are GIFTS from God, and that they come as we use our AGENCY.  If we want the present given to us, we must be willing to receive it.

Happy One Year Anniversary!!

A year ago today, we packed up the car with suitcases, the family, and two missionaries.  What a wonderful year it has been!!!  I miss them terribly, but I am also happy they are where they are, doing what they are doing.  I wouldn't have it any other way!!

how appropriate

I have been thinking about Easter all week.  I kept feeling that I was missing something and thought maybe it was because 3 of my kids would not be waking up to Easter candy and coloring eggs.  I had been studying the Saviors life and Resurrection all week, studying conference talks, scriptures, youtube videos, and really thought I understood it all.  Of course, just when we think it is all going good, something happens to humble us.

I was ready for Church on time, walking out the door, all ready to be spiritually fed.  I always look forward to Church.  There was a time when I dreaded the thought of going, and only went because it was the right thing to do.  Now I love going.  I love Sunday School.  I love the Sacrament talks.  I love Fast and testimony meeting.  I love Relief Society.  I enjoy every meeting.  I love the feeling I have when it is finished, like a renewal of Spirit.

Needless to say, I never made it to the car.  I fell out my front door, right on my butt, skirt flying up, scraping and twisting arms, twisting an ankle and foot.  My foot immediately swelled, and I couldn't stand on it.  Once I got in the house, ice bags were placed on it, they propped it up, and Kiana stayed home with me in case I needed to run to the after hours clinic.  Drue headed off to Church, because he was being called as A Primary teacher. 

I sat for 3 hours, with ice on my foot and ankle, feeling lousy and depressed.  Why would this happen before Church?  Why me?  What did I need to learn?  As I pondered the meaning of Easter I realized that although I had focused my attention and studies on the Resurrection, I had not truly considered the Atonement.  My pain was His pain.  My humiliation was His humiliation.  My Joy is because of Him.  he takes my sorrow upon Himself.  How can I ever be like Him?

I hurt today.  I know He hurts today too--for me.

And my baby is 16

How did time pass so quickly?  Yesterday Kiana turned 16.  It has been a rollercoaster type of month.  Not everything she dreamed for came to pass, but at least she tried.  The important thing in life is that we try.  I wish for her that she knew the extent of her greatness, and yet, if she did she might not have the simple humility that makes her so compassionate.  I keep thinking of that song, "I Hope You Dance".  I hope that every heartbreak turns into determination.

So today, for Kiana:

I hope you never lose your sense of wonder
You get your fill to eat
But always keep that hunger
May you never take one single breath for granted
God forbid love ever leave you empty handed
I hope you still feel small
When you stand by the ocean
Whenever one door closes, I hope one more opens
Promise me you'll give faith a fighting chance

And when you get the choice to sit it out or dance
I hope you dance
I hope you dance

I hope you never fear those mountains in the distance
Never settle for the path of least resistance
Living might mean taking chances
But they're worth taking
Lovin' might be a mistake
But it's worth making
Don't let some hell bent heart
Leave you bitter
When you come close to selling out
Reconsider
Give the heavens above
More than just a passing glance

And when you get the choice to sit it out or dance
I hope you dance
(Time is a real and constant motion always)
I hope you dance
(Rolling us along)
I hope you dance
(Tell me who)
I hope you dance
(Wants to look back on their youth and wonder)
(Where those years have gone)

I hope you still feel small
When you stand by the ocean
Whenever one door closes, I hope one more opens
Promise me you'll give faith a fighting chance

And when you get the choice to sit it out or dance
Dance
I hope you dance
I hope you dance
(Time is a real and constant motion always)
I hope you dance
(Rolling us along)
I hope you dance
(Tell me who)
(Wants to look back on their youth and wonder)
I hope you dance
(Where those years have gone)

(Tell me who)
I hope you dance
(Wants to look back on their youth and wonder)
(Where those years have gone)