I have been thinking a lot lately about sacrifices, trials, and strength. Why can one person have a trial, and they never see it as a trial? What makes that person so strong? Take for instance my daughter. She has dealt with a trial for a few years, but she has never seen it as a burden. She has always been thankful that she has not had a worse medical affliction. She was even told she would be limited where she would be able to serve a mission, and yet the Lord sent her to Guatemala. I think He sent her there because He knew her and knew that she could handle less than ideal situations. She had already proved that to Him. I really admire her strength.
I wonder, would I be able to overcome my physical limitations, or work through the pain, or have the strength? I doubt it. My hope would be that I could push past my own selfishness and learn to serve others. I have decided to make some new goals. I am not sure what they will be, but I know the direction I want to go with this. I want to become a person who can overcome, who can serve without selfish thoughts, and who can learn to NOT give myself limits
Saturday, August 21, 2010
Tuesday, August 17, 2010
Maybe I should pay attention to comments left on blogs???
This morning I was fine tuning my kids blogs and found a comment on Kade's blog that upset me. Kade had a kid in his district in the MTC that went home early. They worked so hard with this Elder, and even fasted many days for him.They were all so devastated when he went home. It was just a couple of weeks before they were to go out into the field..
The mom of the boy posted a comment on Kade's blog saying that if her son had had better companions he wouldn't have gone home. Now I understand that she is upset that her son came home, but it was harsh--very harsh. It is not up to other 19 year old boys to keep another boy their age on a mission. A mission is not for everyone. I wish I could get a hold of the mom privately, but she has made her identity unavailable or something. I don't think she needed to lash out at me or my son, or any of the other boys for that matter.
So who is strong enough for a mission? Those whom the Lord chooses. We all have baggage. We all have gone through trials. Some are just at a place where they have dealt with it and moved on. Sure it is harder for some. And for others it seems easy. It is my belief that even those who seem to have it easy, really don't. They just learn to make it seem easy. Being in tune with the Lord helps. Sometimes that is a real struggle. Real life bogs us down with insecurities, trials, distractions, excuses. We need to rely on Him.
I can never figure out why coming home from a mission early for medical or emotional reasons is a big deal. And yet people make it a big deal, both the family of the one that returned, and the people around them. It is not failure, nor is it failure to not go on a mission. It is failure to not live up to the Gospel standards, and last time I looked leaving a mission early or not going on a mission did not necessarily go hand in hand with unworthiness. Really good guys have not served missions, my husband included. I hope we can all learn to be a bit more understanding. Sure a mission is one of the greatest things a person can do, but we can all still be great if we want to.
The mom of the boy posted a comment on Kade's blog saying that if her son had had better companions he wouldn't have gone home. Now I understand that she is upset that her son came home, but it was harsh--very harsh. It is not up to other 19 year old boys to keep another boy their age on a mission. A mission is not for everyone. I wish I could get a hold of the mom privately, but she has made her identity unavailable or something. I don't think she needed to lash out at me or my son, or any of the other boys for that matter.
So who is strong enough for a mission? Those whom the Lord chooses. We all have baggage. We all have gone through trials. Some are just at a place where they have dealt with it and moved on. Sure it is harder for some. And for others it seems easy. It is my belief that even those who seem to have it easy, really don't. They just learn to make it seem easy. Being in tune with the Lord helps. Sometimes that is a real struggle. Real life bogs us down with insecurities, trials, distractions, excuses. We need to rely on Him.
I can never figure out why coming home from a mission early for medical or emotional reasons is a big deal. And yet people make it a big deal, both the family of the one that returned, and the people around them. It is not failure, nor is it failure to not go on a mission. It is failure to not live up to the Gospel standards, and last time I looked leaving a mission early or not going on a mission did not necessarily go hand in hand with unworthiness. Really good guys have not served missions, my husband included. I hope we can all learn to be a bit more understanding. Sure a mission is one of the greatest things a person can do, but we can all still be great if we want to.
Saturday, August 7, 2010
thou shalt triumph over all thy foes.......
“My son, peace be unto thy soul; thine adversity and thine afflictions shall be but a small moment;
“And then, if thou endure it well, God shall exalt thee on high; thou shalt triumph over all thy foes” (D&C 121:7–8)
Most people that know me don't know that I have suffered with a certain affliction for a few years. It is called Fibromyalgia, and is a common condition characterized by long-term, body-wide pain and tender points in joints, muscles, tendons, and other soft tissues. Fibromyalgia has also been linked to fatigue, morning stiffness, sleep problems, headaches, numbness in hands and feet, depression, and anxiety. Mine probably began 15 years ago after the birth of my last child, but I was told over and over that I was "just tired". It took a female doctor to finally diagnose me with something more than just being tired. Of course, she actually listened--go figure.
Most of the time I do okay with it, but there are times when I have an episode. I literally hurt, no matter what. It is those days when I wonder what I am doing and why. Most of the time I have no problem doing an hour on my treadmill, but give me an episode, and I am in pain when I walk to the car.
This past week I have had an episode. It really began on my birthday when I drank a Diet Coke. Yep, that triggers it. I have been almost Diet Coke, and soda free for almost 2 years. In those 2 years, I have had hardly any pain associated with my Fibro. It still happens once in awhile, but I have dramatically cut down on episodes.
The scripture above helps to remind me that I can do it--I can endure this pain. And things can always be worse. Mine is such a minor affliction. Positive attitude always helps too. The more I feel sorry for myself, the more I feel the pain. The more I focus on someone else, the less pain felt. I think that may be a lesson the Savior was trying to teach us--focus on others, and not ourselves.
I am still feeling weepy when I think of Destinee and Kade being gone. I can't wait for school to get back in session so I can go to the Temple again. I really think it renews the Spirit. I love going in the late mornings when things aren't overly busy, and I am not in a hurry to get back home. I enjoyed that time with Destinee so much, especially the day we did work for Grandma and Aunt Geri. What a special day that was!
“And then, if thou endure it well, God shall exalt thee on high; thou shalt triumph over all thy foes” (D&C 121:7–8)
Most people that know me don't know that I have suffered with a certain affliction for a few years. It is called Fibromyalgia, and is a common condition characterized by long-term, body-wide pain and tender points in joints, muscles, tendons, and other soft tissues. Fibromyalgia has also been linked to fatigue, morning stiffness, sleep problems, headaches, numbness in hands and feet, depression, and anxiety. Mine probably began 15 years ago after the birth of my last child, but I was told over and over that I was "just tired". It took a female doctor to finally diagnose me with something more than just being tired. Of course, she actually listened--go figure.
Most of the time I do okay with it, but there are times when I have an episode. I literally hurt, no matter what. It is those days when I wonder what I am doing and why. Most of the time I have no problem doing an hour on my treadmill, but give me an episode, and I am in pain when I walk to the car.
This past week I have had an episode. It really began on my birthday when I drank a Diet Coke. Yep, that triggers it. I have been almost Diet Coke, and soda free for almost 2 years. In those 2 years, I have had hardly any pain associated with my Fibro. It still happens once in awhile, but I have dramatically cut down on episodes.
The scripture above helps to remind me that I can do it--I can endure this pain. And things can always be worse. Mine is such a minor affliction. Positive attitude always helps too. The more I feel sorry for myself, the more I feel the pain. The more I focus on someone else, the less pain felt. I think that may be a lesson the Savior was trying to teach us--focus on others, and not ourselves.
I am still feeling weepy when I think of Destinee and Kade being gone. I can't wait for school to get back in session so I can go to the Temple again. I really think it renews the Spirit. I love going in the late mornings when things aren't overly busy, and I am not in a hurry to get back home. I enjoyed that time with Destinee so much, especially the day we did work for Grandma and Aunt Geri. What a special day that was!
Tuesday, August 3, 2010
quiet time
It is amazing how you hope for something, and then you get it, and you don't want it any more. For a couple of weeks I have been hoping for just a little bit of down time. I really really needed it. Well guess what, I got it and it is too dang quiet!!!
It has been fun keeping up with Destinee and Kade's missions. I feel really overwhelmed, but it is so fun to share in the adventure. And I love being in spiritual mode. Lately a lot has happened that might make some question their beliefs but for me it has strengthened them. I have someone targeting my beliefs. I got a bit snappy about it one day and my daughter calmed me down and stopped me from being a total poop. I admire my daughter so much. She doesn't know that she actually knows more than me, and that is impressive given that she is only 15. Sure I have lived longer, and have more book knowledge, and some more life knowledge, but she surpasses me in spiritual knowledge. Wow, what would it have been like to have that at 15?
I know a girl who is thinking about a mission. I know she wants to get married. I wonder if there will be a time when young ladies are actually encouraged to go on missions instead of just waiting around to get married? A mission is such a life building experience and if they learn to serve as a missionary does, they will be much better wives and mothers. I hope this young lady continues to fill out her papers, and does serve a mission. The right guy will be here when she gets home. I am proud of Destinee for making that decision. She knew it was the right thing to do. I sure wish I had had the opportunity.
It has been fun keeping up with Destinee and Kade's missions. I feel really overwhelmed, but it is so fun to share in the adventure. And I love being in spiritual mode. Lately a lot has happened that might make some question their beliefs but for me it has strengthened them. I have someone targeting my beliefs. I got a bit snappy about it one day and my daughter calmed me down and stopped me from being a total poop. I admire my daughter so much. She doesn't know that she actually knows more than me, and that is impressive given that she is only 15. Sure I have lived longer, and have more book knowledge, and some more life knowledge, but she surpasses me in spiritual knowledge. Wow, what would it have been like to have that at 15?
I know a girl who is thinking about a mission. I know she wants to get married. I wonder if there will be a time when young ladies are actually encouraged to go on missions instead of just waiting around to get married? A mission is such a life building experience and if they learn to serve as a missionary does, they will be much better wives and mothers. I hope this young lady continues to fill out her papers, and does serve a mission. The right guy will be here when she gets home. I am proud of Destinee for making that decision. She knew it was the right thing to do. I sure wish I had had the opportunity.
Saturday, July 17, 2010
blah, blah, blah
I was expecting a letter from Kade today. I have gotten a hand written one from him every week since he went in the MTC except for the weeks we were in Oregon, and then I told him not to. I guess I need to learn to not expect it since he will be going to California on the 27th and will be busy sharing the Gospel. BUT, I was hoping.
This week I have been missing Destinee and Kade more. I don't know why. I ate mushrooms and thought of Destinee. I heard Kade say something, but it wasn't him. I sometimes feel sad, just because, and then I realize that half of my kids are not accessible by phone or texting. I have to remind myself that this is where I want them, and that I could not have had better kids. Where else would I want them?
And so........I look forward to tomorrow, for Church, for spiritual renewal.
This week I have been missing Destinee and Kade more. I don't know why. I ate mushrooms and thought of Destinee. I heard Kade say something, but it wasn't him. I sometimes feel sad, just because, and then I realize that half of my kids are not accessible by phone or texting. I have to remind myself that this is where I want them, and that I could not have had better kids. Where else would I want them?
And so........I look forward to tomorrow, for Church, for spiritual renewal.
Wednesday, July 14, 2010
The beautiful Oregon Coast
Every once in awhile we just have to get away. One of our favorite places is the Oregon coast. This year it was just Kiana and Ty that were able to go with us, since Destinee and Kade are on missions. We usually like to follow the Columbia River and this time was no exception. along the Columbia River we stopped at a rest area. From it you could see an Island, Memaloose, Island of the Dead. the Indian Peoples of the Columbia River placed their dead in cedar vaults on this Island.
Our next stop was Fort Stevens, where we visited the remains of the shipwreck, the Peter Iredale. It was an English sailing ship that ran aground during a storm in 1906.
Thursday, July 8, 2010
The 800 Club
Today I stopped by the UPS store to drop off a package for Kade. He has been sick, and also needed a few things like more athletic socks, his Spanish dictionary, and more cough medicine. I only paid 3 dollars for two packages totaling more than 8 lbs. Pretty good. If I had kept them under 4 lbs, it would have been free, but we kind of threw in some treats.
The gentleman at the store and I were chatting, and I mentioned that I had a daughter in the Guatemala MTC also (too bad a package there isn't cheap). He said, "Oh, you are a member of the 800 club." I was like, what???? He then proceeded to tell me that, copying the Christian 700 club, LDS parents that have 2 children serving are in the 800 club. Get it? We pay 800 dollars a month--lol. Well, every penny is worth it! And a lot of parents mention that in the end it is cheaper than having them home. I don't know about that, but we do have less people in the house. We will see if the bills go down.
One thing that I am struggling with is learning how to cook for 4, soon to be 3. I make way too much food. Kade ate a lot I guess. And he never gained weight!
Another thing that has changed is that we got a dog. I wasn't sure we wanted one, but apparently the majority of the "we" did. He is a cutie, and he is fun, but puppies are a lot of work!
The gentleman at the store and I were chatting, and I mentioned that I had a daughter in the Guatemala MTC also (too bad a package there isn't cheap). He said, "Oh, you are a member of the 800 club." I was like, what???? He then proceeded to tell me that, copying the Christian 700 club, LDS parents that have 2 children serving are in the 800 club. Get it? We pay 800 dollars a month--lol. Well, every penny is worth it! And a lot of parents mention that in the end it is cheaper than having them home. I don't know about that, but we do have less people in the house. We will see if the bills go down.
One thing that I am struggling with is learning how to cook for 4, soon to be 3. I make way too much food. Kade ate a lot I guess. And he never gained weight!
Another thing that has changed is that we got a dog. I wasn't sure we wanted one, but apparently the majority of the "we" did. He is a cutie, and he is fun, but puppies are a lot of work!
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